Monday, March 31, 2014

Monday Memories - What He Drives.

Tonight for family home evening we started spring clean-up in the yard.  Calvin sawed while I hauled, and I raked while he mowed.

I was cursing and blessing that new, orange lawnmower under my breath as I raked.  Cursing it because it cost so much and blessing it because it eats rocks for lunch.  And then . . . and then . . . and then I remembered this picture from our photo album.  Calvin with another red-orange machine . . .

Calvin's first car circa 1972

. . . I can't decide what I think is the funniest:  Calvin's skinny belt, plaid bell-bottom pants (are those cuffs, too?), frilly shirt, bow tie, or part down the middle of his hair.  All I know is that I keep giggling while I'm typing this post and seeing this picture.  Calvin is reading a book while sitting on the couch next to my chair.  Every time I laugh he says, "What?" and I laugh more.  Then he re-explains, "It was a nice car, Jane -- and that's a Butch-Cassidy-and-the-Sundance-Kid shirt, those were nice shirts -- that car had air conditioning, a cassette player, and white leather interior.  It was a sports car, Jane."

Well 42 years later, Calvin's not quite so sporty (he says I didn't meet him until after he'd been humbled in life) and he drives a lawnmower instead of a 240 Z.  And here's the crazy thing, that lawnmower cost $200 more than the car.

Of course 240 Z's don't eat rocks for lunch either.

(Jorden Jolley mentioned on Facebook that she's glad to see Calvin still likes to wear red plaid.  Ha.  I never even noticed that.  Those pants make so much more sense now!)

52 Blessings - Belonging

cheering on our young men in the church basketball tournament

I’m grateful to belong to the of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It is a great blessing.

  • Being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has given me fellowship. 

We call each other Brother and Sister and our congregation is considered our ward family.

On Monday we went to a funeral. We had never met the woman, but we know her son and his family well. They are a part of our ward family, so we went to mourn with those that mourn.

Brother Jensen was at the funeral as well. When Brother Jensen meets you in a crowd, or on the street, or in the driveway, or at a funeral he tells you a joke to say hello. Monday after the service, he came over shook my hand and told a joke. But, he forgot the punch line. Try as he might he couldn’t remember it. He walked off shaking his head trying to think of it.

Thursday night at 9:00, Brother Jensen called. He answered my hello with, “First a ring then you wake up.”

I said, “Pardon me?” and he repeated a little louder, “First a ring then you wake up. That’s the punchline.”

I laughed heartily even though I no longer remembered the joke, because there is just something funny about a delayed joke from an eighty year old brother at 9:00 at night.

  • Being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has not only given me fellowship, but also opportunities to discover and build talents.

On Wednesday we taught the Young Women a lesson about honesty and helped them make a flannel board story they could take home to teach their families. I made a big batch of caramel popcorn (from a recipe that I’m fairly certain is in every Mormon cookbook published since sweetened condensed milk was invented) to use as an object lesson. Being a member of the LDS church has giving me lots of opportunities to teach and develop teaching skills.

  • Being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has not only given me fellowship and opportunities to discover and build talents, but it’s given me experiences to serve others.

Saturday was bow day. Five young men plus Brother Tucker, Brother Roylance, and Brother Clark came and worked in the shop while Calvin helped them make their bows. At noon they came in to eat. We had hoped to have a wiener roast, but it was too windy, so we had pasta bake (all right, all right, it was goulash) instead. When the boys started the bows a few weeks ago, I suggested to Calvin that the boys come in the house to eat rather than eating in the shop. I thought of those boys, some who live in chaos, and doubted they seldom if ever have family meals together. I thought everyone ought to have that experience. So they do. They come in together, laughing because Calvin and Brother Roylance are teasing them. They wash their hands at the kitchen sink and ask what they can do to help. Yesterday all nine of those bodies crowded around the kitchen table. Down the middle of the table was the oversized pan of pasta, a wire basket of hot breadsticks, and a bowl of green beans. After a blessing was said on the food and the men had filled their plates, Calvin had everyone go around the table and give an appreciation to the man sitting to their left. It was down-right neighborly and good for everyone. Seeing those men fill their plates again and again, and listening to the conversation was very satisfying. For dessert they ate a cookie sheet full of chocolate chip bars.  I learned to cook for a family as a girl, but I have honed crowd cooking by feeding my church family.

  • Being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has not only given me fellowship, opportunities to discover and build talents, and experiences to serve, it’s also given me understanding of the laws of God and great peace from the Atonement of Jesus Christ.

Saturday night I attended the General Women’s meeting of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Hundreds of thousands of women across the world attended (or tuned into this meeting). It wasn’t necessarily what was said, though it was inspiring. It wasn’t necessarily what was sung, though the songs were beautiful. It wasn’t necessarily seeing the mothers holding their little daughters’ hands, or young women standing with confidence and hope, or the older sisters sitting comfortably next to each other, though each scene was tender and sweet. It was all of it. It was a massive group of women gathered together to learn from sight, sound, and example graced by the Spirit of God. I felt peace in a muddled and troubled time of history. I sat quietly crying inside as I participated in the meeting because the Spirit felt so calm and beautiful.

Being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is not like a club I participate in weekly, it’s a way of life. The teachings, doctrines, and covenants apply every day.  And it's a daily challenge to live what I know and believe.

But the best part is that everyone is invited to participate in and belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  It's not a church for an exclusive few.  It's for everyone.  I'm grateful to be a member.

Monday, March 24, 2014

Monday Memories - Sunday Dinner

Sunday dinners are one of my top 100 "good things."  There is nothing quite like coming in the door after church and smelling the roast, or meatloaf, or lasagna, or chicken in their final minutes of cooking.  It's like a congratulatory nose high-five for making it through three hours of church and its attendant responsibilities -- keeping a toddler contained, a baby quiet, a lesson taught, a talk given, a withdrawn teenager involved, a song sung, or usually a combination of them all.  The oven says, "Well done church-goer, welcome home."

Joe, Zeph, Ray, Calvin, Henry, and Abe waiting for the final touches of
Sunday dinner while watching the final minute of a bb game.

On Sunday, Calvin and I made a quick  trip to Seattle to see Joe, Ande, and Zeph who were there for a friend's wedding.  As the family sat around Ray and Cali's dining room table I thought of what a familiar sight and routine Sunday dinners are . . . and how I never grow tired of them.

We started the meal off with "cheers."  Ray and Abe always include a toast at family gatherings. Yesterday's topic was "something we look forward to in Spring."  It's always fun to hear what is on others' minds -- new life, baby calves, chicks, and pigs, being outside, strawberries that taste like strawberries, working in the garden, the sun, birthdays, Easter, Hope -- and clinking goblets around the table.  My favorite part yesterday was watching Levin with his plastic cup and over-sized bib. It's hard to ration sparkling lemonade to nine individual sips when you're two years old, but by the last couple of toasts he knew to excitedly raise his cup because it meant one more sip.  When the last toast was made he cried for "more cheers," interpreted as more lemonade.  Seeing his enthusiasm I expect he'll carry on the tradition of his father and uncle.

I was in charge of the dinner yesterday and it wasn't fancy, in fact it wasn't even very good, but it didn't matter.  It was the fact that we were together and investing in family and each other.  After dinner Abe, Grace, and Henry had to get back home.  Calvin, Zeph, and Levin went to the bedrooms to take naps, Joe and Ray fell asleep on the family room rug and couch, and Cali, Ande, Atlas, and I visited at their feet. When everyone woke up we ate a wonderful blackberry bread pudding that Cali and Ande had made for dessert (perhaps the most important course in Sunday dinner).

The day was satisfying on many levels.

Today in class my high-school students all told of one of their favorite family activities.  There were some pretty fun things shared -- trips to Yellowstone, Hawaii, Disneyland, a cruise to the Bahamas, camping.  As the kids told their memories, I remembered several great experiences our family has had.  But when it was my turn to share a favorite family activity I said, "Sitting around the table each night to eat supper and eating Sunday dinner together."  When it boiled down to it, I found that simple tradition, repeated over and over, actually trumped the other memories.

One young man said he didn't like being with his family (it is a pretty contentious lot) and he does everything he can to avoid being with them when they're together.  His experience provided a stark contrast for those who do have good family memories.

Here's to Sunday dinner.  And supper together.  And families that like each other.  Clink.

*If you'd have been eating with us, what would your toast to Spring have been?

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Life in Our World - Six for Saturday

Calvin getting Juan to smile while he's trying to concentrate on making an arrow.
 It doesn't take much to get Juan to smile and his grin covers his whole face.  

The boys finally got to start their bows today.    

They were so appreciative and excited. 

Danielsen and Bobby making arrows.

I had some leftover ham and beans in the freezer and made some toast rounds and much-too-flat, no-bake cookies to go with them.  It was plain fare, fare I'd normally have been too embarrassed to serve to company, but they ate it happily and acted like I'd done them a huge favor.  Not one boy would go back out to work on the bows until they'd cleared the table and wiped it clean.  It was very sweet.


Friday was our temple day for the Spanish Branch youth.  Since we had to leave at 3:00 to get to the temple on time, we met in the seminary parking lot (across from the high school) after school.  We knew they'd be hungry, so we put the tailgate down on the pickup and served them bbq sandwiches, chips, and cookies before they loaded into Roylance’s motor-home.  The kids played games all the way down and back.   

I took this picture of Nesha Roylance and sent it to her.
She texted back, "Old truck drivers never die . . . "
True.  She's driven just about every kind of truck a farmer owns.

The young men of the Branch.

Calvin and I really enjoy serving in the Spanish Branch and working with Brent and Nesha Roylance and Mitch Poth.


Often when I pull into the driveway after work, Dan runs to the calves in the pasture, right up to their noses, and barks and barks to tell them I’m home.  They could care less if I’m home or not and ignore him.  

Actually they act perturbed, but their lack of enthusiasm doesn’t dampen his, he just rolls in the manure instead then races back to the car so that he’s there by the time the door opens.  He stinks to high heavens, but he expects me to be as excited to see him as he is to see me.

Eeeek.  I carefully, very carefully, scratch the top of his head with one finger and tell him we’ll go on a walk later.  Much later.  After he’s rolled in the grass and aired out in the sun.

This morning we went on long, early morning walk to make up for those promised walks that didn’t happen this week.  He is such a good dog.  I dread the day he isn’t there to welcome me home.  


We are great-grandparents.  No lie!  Our oldest son from Calvin's first marriage, Trevor and his wife, Michelle are grandparents so that bumps us up to greats.  Jake and Nikki had their baby boy this week.  

I never tire of seeing dads with their kids.  Never.  It doesn't matter whether it's in a picture or in real life.


I bought this birthday card.  I think it's funny.  And true.

My friend Julie Phipps has a beautiful collection of Polish Pottery.  She drove to Poland
while she lived in Norway and loaded her van to the gills with pieces.  She has given me
three beautiful pieces.  Each of our kids have received a piece from her, as well, as wedding gifts.

Isn't this a beautiful Polish Pottery display?  It was in Costco.  I love that blue, polka-dotted, $155 bowl in the lower-left corner the most.  

And that's life in our world this week.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Thursday Thinking - Rough

Rough has been on my mind the last few days . . .

1.rough rəf/ coarse

While I really doubt that any recipe is original -- with billions (or is it trillions) of people having lived since the time of Adam and every one of them needing to eat repeated times a day to stay alive, I imagine edible ingredients have been mixed and remixed to make the same concoction thousands of times. To claim originality would be presumptuous.  Nonetheless, here's a recipe I mixed this week that I haven't seen before.

Rough Muffins

1 1/2 cups wheat bran (found in the bulk section of health or grocery stores)
1 1/2 cups buttermilk
1/2 cup coconut flour
1/2 cup whole wheat flour
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
2/3 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup oil (or you may want to substitute applesauce)
3 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup chopped almonds (optional)
1/2 cup coconut (optional)

Measure wheat bran into mixing bowl and pour buttermilk over it.  Let it soak ten minutes.  Add coconut flour, wheat flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, and brown sugar.  After well mixed, add oil, eggs, and vanilla.  Mix until all is thoroughly moistened.  Stir in almonds and coconut.  Fill greased muffin tins 2/3 full of batter and bake in a 375 degree oven for 15-20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.

Let them set for 5 minutes and then remove from muffin tin and cool on a wire rack. 


As you can see, these muffins have an ample amount of roughage in them.  With wheat flour having 3.4 grams of fiber per cup, wheat bran having 25 grams of fiber per cup, and coconut flour having a whopping 64 grams of fiber per cup, each little muffin packs a lot of bulk.  Which means that you feel very full after having eaten only two of these muffins.

Mind you, they aren't the most flavorful muffin you'll ever eat, but they are healthy and I like them, especially because I feel full for such a long time after eating them.

2. rough rəf/violent; difficult; to give a beating to, manhandle, or subject to physical violence

Calvin and I both read Elizabeth Smart's book, My Story, this week.  (Remember she is the 14 year old girl that was abducted from her Salt Lake City, Utah home back in 2002.)   My.  She had it rough.  Really rough. We both appreciated the book and were glad we had someone to discuss it with as we read it.

It was a disturbing read.

It was an encouraging read.

Chapter 40 was plain inspiring.  Best self-help advice I've ever read in a book.

It was a difficult story to tell and Chris Stewart did a good job of untangling a very convoluted, yet repetitious and harrowing account.

Thank you to Elizabeth Smart for teaching us and Chris Stewart for helping her deliver that message.

I literally have been chewing - mentally and physically - on both of these rough things all week . . . as well as the rough news of the missing Malaysian plane and Russia's march.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Tuesday Tried It - "Modesty is Fundamental"

I have no idea if this idea is on pinterest, but if it's not it should be! We had a great time, it took minimal planning, the girls interacted and helped each other, and they learned.

We went to Wal-Mart for a Young Women's activity.  Our purpose?  Practicing how to dress modestly.

Before going to the store we read For the Strength of Youth - Dress and Appearance and then each girl was given an envelope with her assignment and some monopoly money.  
  • Your assignment: Put together an outfit that is appropriate for a day at the sand dunes/lake.  $32
  • Your assignment: Put together an outfit that is appropriate for a trip to the temple.  $43
  • Your assignment: Put together an outfit that is appropriate for school.  $37
  • Your assignment: Put together an outfit that is appropriate for a formal dance.  $105
  • Your assignment: Put together an outfit that is appropriate for senior pictures.  $41
  • Your assignment: Put together an outfit that is appropriate for sleeping. $26
They had 25 minutes to put their outfits together.  Lucky for us, Wal-Mart had a big clearance sale which left a 6' section with nothing on it . . . and shirts for a dollar.  The girls shopped and then displayed their outfits on that 6' section for each other to see.  Each girl talked about her outfit and told us how much it cost.  Then they voted on which outfit they were most likely to wear.  

A&K choosing pajamas

R&D looking for swimming suits and getting sidetracked with the sales

D&H looking for formal wear and school clothes

Karen's outfit (appropriate for the temple:  a white gauzy skirt, soft-gray, striped shirt with a white cardigan, and a butterfly necklace) won the prize.  She could choose between a pair of socks or fingernail polish for her prize - she chose yellow fingernail polish.

After the girls finished putting all the clothes, shoes, and bling back on the racks where they found them, we met in the breezeway and ate Reese's  peanut butter eggs while each girl taught the group what she had learned. The main thing they came to understand is that modesty is a way of life.

It was a fun, repeatable activity.

(While the girls were shopping, I saw one of my friends from Moldova.  She works in the men’s department. She has very, very, very little English. I talked to her for a few minutes, and then my friend Laura [from the Spanish Branch] joined us. Laura works in the underwear department and she also speaks very, very, very little English. There we were in a triangle of languages trying to talk to each other.  There was a whole lot of “say that again” and “one more time” and smiling and nodding going on.  It was the best.  None of us let a little thing like language get in the way of being friends.)

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Life in Our World - 14+ Pictures for the 14th of March in the Year 2014

Zeph - Playing with babysitters G-Ma and E-Pa
(or Holly and Eric).

Joe - our new line of chalk and 
clay paints for DIYers.

Ande - My garden. It has pineapple plants,
basil, and tiny little bean sprouts.

Eliza: I backed myself into a trap, but I’m not too sad about it.

Ty: Sporting my three-day-old mustache for
Mustache March while studying.

Michelle: Today google taught me that vegetable
oil is great for getting things un-sticky.

Afton - "Look Mom, I'm hiding."

Grace - Out for a walk and enjoying the blossoms

Henry's out growing his newborn clothes.
He had a blowout while we were out and
about running errands and these were the
only pajamas to change Henry into.
Poor little guy couldn't straighten out his legs!

Abe - Playing catch with my boy.

Levin kept telling Cali he found a tractor that
had pokers. Cali kept telling him tractors don't have
pokers. Here he is proving Cali wrong.
"Sometimes even mamas make mistakes..."

Atlas and Cali are both perplexed on how to
teach a 9 month old to suck the food out.
We finally gave up and just used a spoon.

Ray - For months Cali has been looking for the
perfect way to inspect ears . . . Today she found it.

      Cali - The only flip flops Walmart had that were under $3. 
Pink camo it is, then.

Calvin - Visiting family in Seattle and showing 
Henry to the moon and stars

Jane - We came to Seattle for the weekend.  
Levin had been to the park and picked someone's
daffodils - one for me and one for his mom.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Homemaking Tip - Seeds&Things

Mother Nature threw us a bone.  She gave us two days of 60 degree weather and I not only went coat-less, but Calvin almost went vest-less, and we both got garden fever.  

Last night Calvin planted Big Jim chile pepper and tomato seeds in starter trays . . .  

. . . while I made seed tape.

We bought seed tape for the first time a few years ago.  If you plant in windy weather and the seeds scatter when you plant, or if you get tired of having crowded, intertwined carrots you would probably love seed tape.  But, seed tape is expensive, hard to find, and has a very small selection.   So I read on the internet how to make our own.

1.  Roll out ten feet of toilet paper.  Fold and cut in half lengthwise.

2.  Put a dot of white glue (colored glue would make it easier to see) wherever you want a seed (for carrots it's 1/2 inch space between seeds)

3.  Place the seed on the dot of glue.

4.  Let the glue dry and then roll the toilet paper strip and put it in a baggie with planting instructions.

5.  Store in a cool, dry place until you're ready to plant.

Be warned, making seed tape is time consuming.  Suddenly it doesn't seem so expensive when you see how long it takes to make your own, but choosing your variety makes it worthwhile even if the cost doesn't.  I've still got a lot of seed tape to make (lettuce, flowers, etc.) so I'll listen to a book on tape while I do.

This afternoon I planted an herb pot with chives and cilantro.  Now that the dining room is rearranged, I think there is a spot with enough sun to keep the plants alive until the herbs in the garden are ready.

If Mother Nature will just throw us another bone we'll start raking, burning, mowing, cutting, and pruning.  

Sunday, March 9, 2014

52 Blessings - Youth Conference

Calvin and I and Brent and Nesha Roylance drove the youth from the Spanish Branch to the conference.
We left at 6:30 in the am and got home at 12:30 the next am.
Brent and Calvin both got pulled over by the same cop:
Brent for speeding and Calvin for not using his blinker.  
But even that didn't put a damper on the day.

Yesterday we attended a large youth conference with hundreds and hundreds of kids between the ages of 14 and 18.  The conference was held at a college campus and we spent the day attending classes, lectures, and workshops on how to be a better disciple of Jesus Christ.

We had a great time and heard numerous inspiring and motivating presentations.  Many, many talents were volunteered to make this event possible and it is a blessing to live among people who are willing to invest their time, talent, and resources to the growth of other people.  

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Thursday Thinking -

Last week when Levin and Atlas were here we built Levin a fort in the living room.  Calvin said every kid needs a fort.

The next day Levin put the laundry hamper on top of his fort and, obviously happy, said, "Look, I made a temple!"

The day after Levin made his temple, Cali (who was in San Diego) sent this picture of the San Diego temple. She, too, was happy.  She'd gone to the temple to serve and commented on how beautiful (both physically and spiritually) it was inside and out.

The pictures were timely.  Neither knew of the other's experience, but both saw the temple as a place of familiarity and desirability.   Levin's enthusiasm for his temple-fort was no less real than was Cali for her experience.

The contrast of Cali and Levin and their temples reminded me of something Neal A. Maxwell wrote:  "Our perfect Father does not expect us to be perfect children yet.  He had only one such child.  Meanwhile, sometimes with smudges on our cheeks, dirt on our hands, and shoes untied, stammering but smilingly we present God with a dandelion as if it were an orchid or rose! If for now the dandelion is the best we have to offer, he receives it, knowing what we may later place on the alter."

Mostly what I have to offer my Father in Heaven is two old blankets that don't match, and a clothes hamper. It's makeshift at best, but my heart is right.  I'm trying and He knows it and He accepts my efforts.  He knows I'll grow and learn and someday I'll be able to offer stained glass and marble after He's worked with me.  And that's a very comforting thought that I learned from Levin's temple-fort.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Tuesday Tried It - I'm a Banana. And you?

I asked each girl what fruit described them best.  

One said, "An apple.  I'm a bit chubby, but I'm really pretty good inside."  

Another said, "A pear.  I'm sweet and tender, but I'm thin-skinned and my feelings get hurt easily.  I guess you could say I bruise quick." 

Still another said, "A strawberry.  Sometimes I'm sweet . . . and sometimes I'm not."  

Next I passed around a basket filled with a variety of fruits.  Each girl picked her favorite and began to eat it. 

By the time they got this graphic from Pinterest that was printed on a piece of cardstock,

they could better appreciate that wishing they looked like someone else was just as silly as wishing away all the fruit in the world but apples.  They better knew (and appreciated). . .  they had such sweet bodies.      

(Dear Readers,

When blogging first began, I used to return a comment on every comment you left.  After a couple of years and writing pages and pages of returned comments, I discovered most of you were no-reply commenters. Which meant all of the return-comments I wrote went into the internet black hole and you never saw them.  I felt like Amelia Bedilia and quit return-commenting.  It's bothered me ever since that when you comment it appears you are ignored.  No more.  I will return-comment in the post's comment section.

Thank you for being such faithful readers.

Your neighbor,


Monday, March 3, 2014

Monday Memories - Diapers-2 Calvin-0

This memory is coming out of the mothballs.

As you know, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has no paid clergy, so members of the congregation give the sermons. One winter day a good twenty seven years ago, Calvin was asked to speak in church. His week had been busy with winter-scout camp, teaching seminary, work, and calving heifers so he asked me at the last minute to bail him out and speak for him.

That Sunday morning I sat up in front of the congregation with the bishopric, other speakers, and chorister. Calvin sat on the back row of the chapel with Cali (3), Abe (1), and Ty (0). Soon after the meeting began, Calvin motioned for me to come down off the stand. He lifted Ty up and away from him and was giving a heavy nod to his diaper. I smiled back at him real big and shook my head, "No."  He motioned more desperately, gave me a stink-eye, and mouthed, “Blow-out.”

Up to that point, I remember Calvin changing one other diaper and that was when Cali was a baby. I’d come home from a Relief Society meeting and he told me how she’d cried and cried and cried because he’d poked her with the diaper pin.

Calvin had started to panic on the back row by now.  It’s not like a 3 year old and a 1 year old are much help in any crisis let alone a diaper crisis. But I was on base. I was safe. Calvin was going to have to take care of that cloth-diaper-change-in-the-days-before-diaper-wipes all on his own.  

And, he did . . . and that memory has been replayed a time or two. Of course when you’ve only changed two diapers in your life, it’s bound to be remembered.

But all this changed when Calvin became a grandpa. Why, he’s changed a dozen diapers in the last few years.

This morning I left to teach seminary at 6. Atlas and Levin have spent several days with us while Cali and Ray have been in San Diego. For several mornings the past week it was Calvin’s job to get Levin and Atlas up, changed, fed, dressed, and to the babysitter by 7:45.

It went off without a hitch.

Until today. 

 I got this text at 7:59 am.


Hahahahaha.  Once again, I was safe on the Lord's errand.  

And when I got home 30 minutes post-crisis, I found him like this:

(Yes you are correct, that would be a cloth diaper draped across his face.  I saved a box of the kids' old ones.  I always thought those diapers would make great bandages in a catastrophe, civil war, or earthquake. Finally, after moving that box three different times, I pulled the diapers out of mothballs last year and put them in the rag drawer.  Just in time for Calvin's emergency.)

When he pulled the rag off his face he said, "It was everywhere.  E.v.e.r.y.w.h.e.r.e.  I ran out of wipes. I just grabbed rags and used them.  Check the trash.  I threw them all away."  

Nope.  Not all of them.  There are still plenty of diapers in the drawer . . . and more grandkids.  I've got you covered Calvin.