The Gift

Dick, Jeremy, Abe

Our purpose in going to West Point last weekend was to attend Ring Weekend ceremony for all Firsties (seniors). The idea of a class ring originated at West Point in 1835 and the tradition is very strong still. The rings symbolize more than a fraternity or alma mater, they symbolize that the cadets who wear one stand as a part of the long gray line—a group of men and women who have pledged to protect our Constitution from tyranny or outside forces. Some of the former graduates’ families and widows have donated the deceased's rings to be melted down and poured into the current class’ rings, continuing the tradition of service.

Abe listening to Plebes reciting the ring poop

After the Firsties receive their rings they must walk back to the barracks where the Plebes (freshmen) are waiting for them. Plebes have NO privileges at West Point. They are treated as nonentities and this is the one time they have a token of power. A Plebe may stop the ring-bearing Firstie to admire his ring. And then, as part of the admiration they obnoxiously say:

Oh my gosh, sir!
What a beautiful ring!
What a crass mass of brass and glass!
What a bold mold of rolled gold!
What a cool jewel you got from you school!
See how it sparkles and shines!
It must have cost you a fortune!
May I touch it? May I touch it please, sir?

The Firsties must stand there until the Plebe has finished his verse and stared at the crass mass of brass and glass. (Abe said when he was a Plebe he would say it painfully slow or even make mistakes while saying it so that the Firstie would have to stand there for a long time.)

unknown firstie trying to escape

This year it was raining and such a funny scene—Firsties trying to dodge and outrun hordes of Plebes. It reminded me of tag in first grade, because the Firsties were only safe from the chanting Plebes when they hit the base of barrack steps. When we got to the inward courtyard between the barracks, Abe took off on a dead run to miss the barrage. He was able to skirt them (he must be a quarterback or something), but the Plebes looked like galloping gray ghosts chasing after him.

We went up to Abe's room and met his roommates while he changed his clothes and we hoped to dry out some. Since parents are only allowed in the rooms a couple of times during a cadet’s tenure at the academy, it never gets old seeing their neatly made beds. Each year the cadets are given more privileges and Abe and his two roommates can now have a mini-fridge and futon in their room. Abe sleeps on the hard futon every night rather than sleeping in his bunk and having to make a neat bed in the morning.

The night of the ring ceremony, Ray took us out to supper at the Cheesecake Factory to celebrate. After we had ordered and were waiting for our food, Calvin tapped the glass with his knife and said, “Can I have your attention? Abe has something he’d like to say.” Then Abe pulled out a little black box and said, “Mom, this is for you.”



I opened it and inside was a pin in replica to his class ring. He said how much he appreciated me helping him get through West Point and how he never would have made it without my encouragement and support. It was one of those moments that my heart will replay often for the pin symbolizes more than “thank you” to me. A son must cut the apron strings for proper growth, but even though you know it must be done doesn’t mean it isn't painful. What a wonderful gift to discover that after those apron strings have been cut and your son has learned to balance and walk on his own that he can and will bind himself back to you with bonds much stronger, more durable and flexible. To me, that gold pin replaces the strings and I wear it with as much pride and humility as I wore the apron, but probably with more grace and definitely more patience. I just love it and am so grateful for the gift and all it represents.