SPT—ESFJ

Ty, Ande, Abe, Grace, me, Calvin, Cali, Ray

Each Christmas Eve we have a family program where each member brings a part to share. This year Calvin told each of us why he loved and admired us (sniff), then for my part everyone took a turn telling each person in the family one thing they appreciated about them (sniff. sniff). Ande quoted Shakespeare, Ty did a memory game, Cali quoted the Gettysburg Address, Grace did a card trick, and Abe taught us a Filipino song. Ray had had each of us take a personality assessment earlier in the day and bring our computer print out with us to the family program. He prefaced his part by saying, “Our family is growing and changing and I thought it would be beneficial to all of us if we better understood what makes each other tick.” We all identified our print-out results (I’m an ESFJ) and he read the characteristics that are frequently associated with each of our types. As he read, there was much nodding of the heads, laughing, and outbursts. It was fascinating, more accurate and helpful than other personality quizzes we’d taken, informative, and fun. It helped us to see

1. Where we prefer to focus our attention and energy (extraversion or introversion)
2. The way we prefer to take in information (sensing or intuition)
3. The way we prefer to make decisions (thinking or feeling)
4. How we orient ourselves to the external world—with a judging process or a perceiving process

It felt good to be validated by hearing the assessment. It was even better understanding why members in our family do what they do. But the very best part was realizing/trusting that keeping a family functioning is not just Calvin and my responsibility anymore, that the kids claim ownership in improving and helping our family to succeed. Now that is a gift.