Tuesday, May 12, 2009

SPT—Something New

I did a new thing today, something I’ve never done before. I got a manicure. Beings it is sandal season and time to get my feet presentable I thought I’d do something for my hands too—especially since this is the first year I haven’t chewed my fingernails since 1970.

I went to the beauty school to get it done. I should have followed my gut instinct and run when I sat down and listened to the gutter talk of the four students sitting in the chairs next to me and heard their opinion on what they thought looked good. I should have run when I saw how filthy the salon was—years of gunk and smears and hair glued to the floor. I should have run when the boy that worked on my hands and feet proudly boasted he passed his practical boards that very day with a 77. I should have run when he started barking orders to the girls who were in the middle of cutting hair to get him a file because he didn’t want to get off his stool. I should have run when they yelled back at him. I should have run when I noticed they only had five nail polish colors and one was black and one was yellow. I really should have run when my nails looked like a five year old had played beauty parlor with me—there was lots of paint on the skin, plenty of bare spots on the nails and globs everywhere else. And finally, I should have run when he kept looking at the clock. But no sir, I did not. Dogged fool that I am, I didn’t run until it was over and then it was only to the drug store to get some fingernail polish remover, fingernail polish and topcoat. I came home, showed Calvin and laughed that I paid for the experience, then sat in the sun and gave myself a new manicure and pedicure.


Have you ever had a professional five-year-old paint job?

21 comments:

Hannah said...

This is sadly entertaining. I am kind glad you didn't run, it wouldn't have been near as funny!

Do tell, how much did this royal treatment set you back?

Tiffany Fackrell said...

oh no, that sounds horrible!!! I got money for mother's day to go get myself a pedicure before the trip to hawaii. i will remember not to go to any beauty schools!! Plus it sounds like you could have just stayed home and let Calvin pamper you and he would have done a MUCH better job then what you got...plus the conversation would have been much better and the environment much cleaner...hmmm maybe you should use that option next time...what do you think, do you think Calvin would go for it?!! (now that is a pretty funny picture)

Julie said...

I'm SO sorry! Yes, never go to the icky, dirty, beauty school. 77? He was proud? Make sure you find out where he gets a job and NEVER go there either! Go see Angie, she will truly pamper you.

Jill said...

Good grief, what an awful experience. I'm alarmed that this "school" is sending its students out into the world to inflict their skills on others.

I hope it wasn't too pricey.

Alisa said...

This is funny but so sad at the same time!
Especially since it is such a rare treat.
I did have my nails done a bit awkwardly when I was in 7th grade.
(someone we knew was in "school")
I ended up with tips being put on.
Way to long for a 7th grader. I had to go to the Dr the next day, and had to have my mom come in the room with me because I could not use my hands to take off my shirt!
Oh I do hope you get a 2nd chance at what should be a pleasant and pampering experience. Go.
I will now use your "color guide" when I go check out a new nail place.

Amie said...

This is hilarious... and why I can't bring myself to pay for things like this... I am never pleased... I expect too much because I have a hard time shelling out the money. Although this goes beyond "can't be pleased" - you could have been on candid camera!

deidra said...

My sisters and I all got pedicures last weekend. Luckily the beauty school that we went to was clean and sanitized (not dipping my toes in "years of gunk"). There were two incredibly unprofessional girls, but lucky for me I got a gem of a guy. He just took 2x as long as everyone else. Unfortunately, even after I waited and waited, I smudged my big toe when I put on my sandals. Seemed like such a waste!

Leslie said...

Oh Jane - I feel so bad for you and a little more bad that your story was so funny! I also had a bad nail experience at a beauty school (though that one was in Utah)and I've steered clear of them ever since. It's so awkward to leave a place sometimes though even when your gut (and nailbeds,lol) tell you to run. At least it wasn't a haircut that you had to wait to grow out.

Becky said...

What a funny story! The best manicure I got was a simple, pretty French manicure the day before my wedding (at some cosmetics store at the mall...can't remember the name)...I haven't liked any of my manicure experiences since!

Hope your 5-year-old paint job wasn't too expensive!

melanie said...

Oh dear Jane. I could have warned you, the company in beauty school is definitely some you don't want to keep. Next time, we'll meet at Walmart get out toes done and talk to each other while they talk about how bad my feet are in another language. It's pretty fun! :)

TheBMillers said...

Ha - but so true isn't it. I like to get pedicures but often leave thinking I won't go back (until it's a distant thought and I forget and go again) I usually go to the mall or Walmart as I don't like to pay the high end $ for a salon and I leave thinking 'I could of done better myself' oh well I guess it is just a get away for an hour or so

Barbi

Susan said...

Sadly, I can say that I have a six-year old experience almost every other day. I (heart) finger nail polish remover.

Kathy said...

I think I went to that beauty school ONCE!!!!!!! Amen to your experience. I am with Melanie, meet me at walmart!!! They are fast, clean, do what YOU want and since they talk in a foreign language you can hope that they are being NICE! You really need to try it again sometime, you know like getting back on the horse. It is a luxury that takes a bit of getting used to since most of us wait on others and aren't used to being waited on.
(My verification word is corny, isn't that funny?)

Lori said...

Amen!!! I also went once!!! But the real kicker is did you learn from the experience? Will you go back?

lelly said...

oh. my. word. i'm with hannah... "sadly entertaining." the experience was not good, but the narrative was perfect!!

tina said...

We've had pretty good luck with Elements beauty school in Wenatchee. I wonder if you went to the school where I niece is attending. Sounds like a "great" experience. I did get a bad hair cut at the school, but they didn't do too bad on pedicures for $15. It's pretty risky to give the school a shot - sometimes I wonder about the students' supervision and evaluation!

Amy said...

This made me laugh. So sorry it had to be at your expense though! I was bracing myself for a lovely, peaceful interlude when I read your first sentence. No such luck! But entertainment is better than peace in this case.

Lucy said...

I'm surprised you didn't say anything. Saying something...wise and correcting, seems more in line. But, what a fun story.

You should have gone with the yellow, and then you could have been really hip with your seminary students:)

Rebecca said...

How did you stop biting your nails, tell me the secret! I'm proud of you for going anyways! I hope you do it again to gain a better flavor of the experience. Sounds like there are lots of ladies that want to go with you!

Chandra said...

I want in on this trip to Walmart with Melanie. Maybe after we do lunch we can get our nails done. Make an afternoon out of it. They do a good job there.

Kim Sue said...

scary that they are on their way out the door into the "real world" where people will be paying more for their professional servies!