We held the
Calvin Payne Family Reunion 2015 over Labor Day weekend at our home. We had a great time. Here are a few memories, dictionary style.
Accommodations
Our home has only 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms, but when you add a couple of tents and adaptable people it can sleep 23 comfortably.
Well, almost comfortably. Atlas was a bit cramped.
"Home is the nicest word there is." -- Laura Ingalls Wilder
Babies
We have eight grandchildren four years old and under. That means a whole lot of cute. It means a lot of rocking and holding, too.
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Atlas holding Kathryn |
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Michelle holding Eliza |
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Cali rocking Kathryn and Ezra |
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Cali rocking and feeding Kathryn |
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Grace reading and rocking Levin, Afton and Eliza |
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Grandma rocking Kathryn |
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Eliza holding Ezra |
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Afton holding Kathryn and Eliza |
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Grandma holding Ezra |
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Joe holding Ezra |
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Ty holding Eliza and Afton. |
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Abe holding Henry |
Lots of babies also means lots and lots of diapers,
. . . and a little bit of crying.
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Ande helping Levin with a beesting |
"A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on." -- Carl Sandburg
Chores
The work load was divided by everyone, even the kids.
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Ty, Eliza, Atlas, and Afton gathering the eggs for breakfast. |
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Zeph and Afton helping make biscuits. |
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Atlas and Zeph feeding the steer. |
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Ty and Atlas doing the dishes. |
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Abe, Ray and Calvin moving the grill back and forth depending on the rain. |
“Work relieves us from three great evils, boredom, vice, and want.” --French Proverbs
Day to Day
One of the wonderful parts of being a family is the pooling of talents. Everyone divvied up the responsibilities which made the difference between a good reunion and a great one. For example, Abe's job was to make the schedule, Cali was in charge of the service project, Joe was in charge of two grandchildren projects plus the music, Ande was in charge of food prep and grocery shopping, Grace was in charge of family night and a kid's project, Michelle was in charge of the music video, Ty and Michelle were in charge of the fun activity, Ray was in charge of meaningful conversation, etc.
"Organizing is what you do before you do something,
so that when you do it, it is not all mixed up."
-- A. A. Milne
Eat
Eating meals together played an important part raising our family; therefore food will always be an important part of our gatherings.
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Joe and Abe were on the rib detail. They made goooooood ribs. |
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Grace and Michelle building their pizzas for the grill. |
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Trent, Crisa and Calvin manning the grill. |
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Tradition: Sunday dinner.
We didn't serve it fancy, but it tasted really good: corn on the cob, steaks, melon salad and baked potatoes. |
"All great change in America begins at the dinner table." -- Ronald Reagan
Fort Payne
The kids had suggested in the past that we do a service project whenever we all get together. It felt so good to be on the receiving end of this project -- building a fort for the grandkids.
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Ray and Calvin digging the holes for Fort Payne |
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The crew. |
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Zeph and Ty |
"The happiest people I know are those who lose themselves in the service of others."
-- Gordon B. Hinckley
Grandchildren
After the reunion we asked everyone to share what the 3 highlights of the reunion was for their family. Everyone agreed that one of the best parts was seeing the kids play together.
"Grandparents House: where cousins go to become best friends." -- Anonymous
Harmony
There is too much sadness, selfishness, arguing and fault-finding in many families today. I've seen families broken because of unkind words and unforgiving attitudes and it always worries me; therefore I'm always grateful for our family's happy times of harmony.
“Harmony makes small things grow, lack of it makes great things decay.”
Innovative
The key to the jeep was lost. Really lost. Even prayers couldn't find it quickly.
Ray hotwired it so we could still go on a ride.
We later found the key out in the grass in the tent.
"Failure is a part of innovation -- perhaps the most important part."
-- Curt Richardson
Journal
I'm a believer in keeping a family record. Civilizations with written records are more prosperous than those with only oral histories. I want our family to prosper, therefore I record. Even records of family reunions.
Michelle assigned a hashtag for our Instagram posts. After the reunion she created Chatbooks for every family from everyone's instagram pictures.
Two year old Eliza calls the reunion photo-book her "Everything is Awesome" book (that was the theme of our reunion) and two year old Atlas hugs and pats his book at night and says, "My family."
"When saving for old age, be sure and store some memories." -- Anonymous
Kiara's 6th Birthday
What better way to celebrate your birthday than with lots of cousins and uncles and aunts? Though Kiara had never met any of her cousins before, she quickly became a friend to all of them and took such good care of them. She was so sweet and patient about her birthday and included others in baking, frosting, and decorating her cake.
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Trent and Kiara |
"The way I see it you should live everyday like it's your birthday!" -- Anonymous
La Ta Ta and Dan
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LaTaTa and Henry |
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Eliza and" Dan |
"Happiness is a warm puppy." -- Charlie Brown
Meaningful conversation
Ray was in charge of helping us to have meaningful conversations. A few weeks before the reunion he sent out a list of potential questions so we could come prepared for discussion and sharing.
- Tell about a lesson you learned this past year or a mistake that you learned from
- Share the highlight (best thing that’s happened) and low-light (biggest challenge or most upsetting) of your past 12 months
- Share something you are good at (strength) and something you are working to improve (weakness)
- Come prepared to share your family's credo
Each night we discussed one or more questions and shared credos. I still enjoy reflecting on those conversations. It was a great building time. It built us as individuals and as a family and topped everyone's list as the favorite part of the reunion.
One night we had a great friend's family take all of the kids for 3 hours so we could have uninterrupted time to visit as adults. That was a wise idea and I suspect will be repeated when possible.
“A single conversation across the table with a wise person is worth a month's study of books.”
-- Chinese proverb
Never gets old
The Christmas we got a trampoline as a gift from my sister still stands out in everyone's memory. The trampoline gave our home the extra space it needed during long winter months . . . and it helped consume some of Ty's ever-abundant energy.
This isn't the same old tramp, but it serves the same old purpose. And it played a good part in this reunion.
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Joe jumping with Henry |
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Crisa, Trent and Ethan giving Joe and Afton a big bounce. |
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Ray rolling as hot lava and the kids squealing and trying to jump over him without getting burned. |
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Brena and Kiara |
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Zeph and Afton |
"Fun without a trampoline? That's crazy talk." -- Anonymous or Joe
Old-fashioned Family Home Evening
Our family home evening has had the same format for as long as we've been a family:
Opening Song
Opening Prayer
Business
Parts
Lesson
Closing Song
Closing Prayer
Game
Treats
Grace was in charge of our family home evening and she followed the old format. The familiarity felt so good. For old time's sake, we even sang Hymn 273 and Ghost Riders in the Sky -- two of Calvin's favorites.
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Ethan playing the flute for his part in family night. |
"We cannot afford to neglect this heaven-inspired program [family home evening]. It can bring spiritual growth to each member of the family, helping him or her to withstand the temptations which are everywhere. The lessons learned in the home are those that last the longest."
-- President Thomas S. Monson
Photographs
Cali took pictures for each family.
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Trent and Crisa Brena, Kiara, Ethan |
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Ray and Cali Atlas and Levin |
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Grace and Abe Henry |
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Michelle and Ty Afton, Kathryn, Ezra |
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Joe and Ande Zeph and Ezra |
"A good snapshot stops a moment from running away."
-- Eudora Welty
Quack
I can't remember if there were ducks, but one morning while it was raining outside Joe had all of the kids pretending they were animals. He kept them entertained for a good half hour. I was in the kitchen but could hear them and it was pretty darn funny. They had such a good time.
"I like pigs.
Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals."
-- Winston Churchill
Race, as in Amazing
Ty and Michelle organized the funnest family activity -- The Amazing Race. We were divided into teams and then raced around town to complete the challenges. It was great. in fact it really was amazing. Reliving it after was as funny as living it.
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Ty, Michelle and Eliza with the official yellow envelopes |
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Team Brena Brena, Trent, Abe |
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Team Levin Joe, Levin, Calvin |
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Team Afton Grace, Ande, Afton |
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Team Kiara Kiara, Crisa, Cali |
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Team Ethan -- Also known as The Winners!
I thought Ray would/should drive, but when we ran to the car to start the race he jumped into the passenger side and yelled, "You drive. I think." Turned out to be a great plan. He offered me $100 if I could pass Team Levin. I almost got it. |
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Challenge One.
Team Brena blocking the driveway so no one else could get out until they had finished their puzzle. |
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Challenge Two.
Team Afton at the lake. Ande wrote, "That time I slipped and fell in the lake while holding Afton on our first stop in the Amazing Race. Grace laughed so hard she peed her pants. I laughed so hard I cried. Afton cried that her sparkly skirt got wet.
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Challenge Four.
Cali said, "Although Team Kiara came in dead last, Kiara was sure we were first because she had worn her 'fastest shoes' (Hello Kitty Mary Janes)." |
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Team Levin.
At this point they were in first place. |
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Team Ethan.
So many funny memories of this game. |
"It is a happy talent to know how to play." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Swing
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Afton, Levin, Atlas |
How do you like to go up in a swing,
Up in the air so blue?
Oh, I do think it the pleasantest thing
Ever a child can do!
-- Robert Louis Stevenson
Table
For years, Calvin has wanted to make a family dinner table that would seat everyone, and so he did a few weeks before the reunion. He built it using old-fashioned joinery; there isn't a nail or screw in it. It's made from reclaimed oak found in an old tobacco factory.
It's absolutely beautiful.
"A man who works with his hands is a laborer; a man who works with his hands and
his brain is a craftsman; but a man who works with his hands and his brain and his heart
is an artist." -- Louis Nizer.
Underdog
Who knows how long ago it started, but arm wrestling is as much a part of this family as guns are.
I always root for the underdog.
Which means I root for myself and, now, Calvin. His old man strength has finally been over powered by the young. (He'll argue this, but it doesn't count if you have to tickle your opponent to get them to fall.)
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Ray and Ty |
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Ande and Cali |
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Ande and Michelle |
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Abe and Ty |
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Abe and Calvin |
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Joe and Abe |
"Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm." -- Abraham Lincoln
Visiting
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Trent and Crisa |
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Abe, Grace, Crisa, Trent, Brena |
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Late night snack. |
"Ordinary things are often extraordinary." -- Anonymous
Worms
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Grace made dirt pudding with gummy worms for the kids. |
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Zeph with a wooly worm. |
"Believe what you are doing is important even if you are only grubbing for worms in the backyard."
-- Ronald Reagan
Xtra
Sunday we went to the cemetery like we do every Sunday after Church. Each of the cousins put a flower on Clara's grave and we reminded them of their cousin that is in heaven waiting for all of us and the Resurrection. The kids were extra curious, gentle, and reverent.
We got ready to leave and Afton sat down. She said, "I think I'll just wait here for Clara 'til she gets resurrected." It was extra sweet.
“Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not:
for of such is the kingdom of God.”
Luke 18:16
Yard
We had planned to go boating during the reunion, but the weather was lukewarm not hot. Imagining lots of little grandkids shivering with blue lips, the kids suggested we just stay home and let the grandkids play in the yard instead, and then offered to help in the garden.
I wish I would have captured the pepper-picking crew which included Michelle, and wish I could have captured the conversation. I enjoyed it as much as the help and the help was greatly appreciated.
Ande said this was one of the reunion high-lights for her.
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Ande, Cali, Abe, and Atlas digging potatoes. |
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Cali, Levin, and Ande collecting flower seeds. |
"A seed is a dime's profit to one and a miracle to another." --- LeGrand Richards
Zzzzzzzz
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Ethan |
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Brena |
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Ande, me, and Ty waiting for the next game of Werewolf to start |
"Fatigue is the best pillow." -- Benjamin Franklin
It was one great reunion. It wore us all out and filled us all up. Truly . . .
"The family is central to the Creator's plan for the eternal destiny of His children.
The family is ordained of God."
--The Family: A Proclamation to the World
And we're so grateful for ours